If you are a parent and want to help your child develop a growth mindset, this article is for you.

The two steps to guide a middle or high school teen into a growth mindset. 

Table of content: 

1. What are the benefits of having a growth mindset, and how can this help with your college prep? 
2. How this can help your child succeed in life

1. What are the benefits of having a growth mindset, and how can this help with your college prep?

First, what is a growth mindset?

A growth mindset is the empowered perspective that our brains can change and improve through effort. 

There was a time when Einstein was a baby, for example, when he did not understand that 2+2=4.

There was a time Stephen Curry couldn’t make a layup (for those who don’t know, Stephen Curry is considered the greatest shooter in basketball history and is famous for being accurate in shooting a basketball even from very far distances).

If all skills are developed through effort, then a teen or preteen with a growth mindset would think it is normal to want to keep working and improving when learning gets difficult.

But many teens believe they are either “good at math” or “bad at math.” 

Ironically, sometimes success early on in a child’s life becomes a barrier to future success if they begin to believe that their value comes from being good at something.

If I’m valuable because I’m the best at spelling, or gymnastics, or something else, for example, then any evidence that I’m NOT the best will become a crisis for me.

I wouldn’t want to do any activity that would expose me as being anything other than the best. 

And if I’m not doing new things that I’m not yet good at, then I’m not going to grow, and my progress is stunted. 

This mindset that I’m either good or bad at something is called a fixed mindset. It contrasts with a growth mindset, that says no matter how I evaluate my skills today, I can improve those skills through effort and intention.  

What are the benefits?

Complete confidence doesn’t come from being good at something. True confidence comes from being willing to be bad at something first. 

As school classes get more and more advanced, your (pre)teen will eventually face challenges. If they believe their value as a student or a person comes from how easy it is for them to learn things, then they will doubt themselves as soon as they face material that truly challenges them.  

Students who have not developed a growth mindset will face this self-doubt, either in the classroom, or in another setting, like a research laboratory.

Imagine being a high school student like Ishita.

Stepping into a pristine biology laboratory at an elite research university (Case Western) as a high school student.  

When she arrived for the research, she could have tried to hide her insecurities and pretend she knew more than she did. If she had believed her value came from being the smartest person in the room, then she would have really struggled– not just with the biology work, but with her self-concept as well. 

Of course the research was over her head at first, but she went from being overwhelmed, to being able to contribute, to being able to lead research.

Although she’s still in high school, her research has won multiple awards, won a lot of money, and was the reason Harvard college invited her to come to campus (all expenses paid) to present at a research conference. 

She shares her journey in two podcast interviews, which are both worth listening to. 

The first one is about when she talks about being overwhelmed, and the next podcast is about the result, how she became a research superstar in high school and got to present at Harvard. 

Podcast 1: Defeating overwhelm

At 1:52 in this podcast, Ishita reveals what she discovered was her issues with overwhelm, and at 5:45, she talks about how she changed her focus and how this helped. 

Podcast 2: Become a high school research superstar 

At 4:18, she started discussing one of the research projects she did in high school and what the outcome was.

Go to 7:58, where she talks about how she won the overall award and how this built her confidence. 

I highly recommend listening to the entire podcast, where you will meet a highly confident student who is making a meaningful impact in her community in many ways, including a STEM camp for younger girls. 

Ishita talks about college prep in general in the second interview. If you want to learn more, listen to how she shares her experience throughout her journey. 

At 1:34, she shares how she sees college prep after all that she has gone through - and how this has built confidence, helped her know herself better, and made her a better person.

What does this mean for parents of ambitious children?

Parenting is hard for everyone. I’m not going to pretend that there is one correct way to parent. But there are ways to encourage a growth mindset, and there are behaviours and attitudes that reinforce the toxic fixed mindset as well. 

Encouraging your teen to learn complicated things or take on challenges might seem easy to do, but what about when they begin to struggle? How should you support them as a parent.

What strategies are available that will leave your child more robust and better prepared to defeat challenges?

In this podcast, as a teacher who cares, I speak to parents directly about how you can stunt or support your child to develop a strong growth mindset.